the science of rocks and hard places

I feel for the lady
In the crimson light
With demand on the left
And judgment on the right
Where the lonely ones
Are the most unloved I feel

-ron sexsmith, for the driver

my life is in a suspended state of animation, i might say, if i was a fan of science ficton.

in the same week i did a talk on "self worth", wrote a paper about "divine abandonement", did lights for a play about a broken family, and read most of "to own a dragon"- donald miller's reflections on growing up without a father.

its been way too much to process all at once. the phrase that is making itself most pronounced is "our relationships with our dads can sometimes be projected onto God". i'm not sure what to do with that.

i'm searching for a direction to go with my thoughts. i feel like i dug myself a bit deep. my creativity is taking a bit of a beating. and the fact that every corner of my house is litttered with clutter makes everything all the more joyful. until a certain someone moves out.

so, thats me. stuck between a rock and hard place, until late april. i've taken too much weight on my shoulders, this week.