weekend in the city 4: in a way i lost everything i believed in

i think this is going to be my last entry until next week. because i'm thinking too much.

stuff that happened, that was not neccesarily a big deal, all that much;

1) saw some picassos, warhols, and rembrandts, and greek-women-statues at an arts museum.
2) ate an amish sandwhich
3) drank some sam adams (it kind of sucked).
4) reflected on new york.

i have never loved vancouver more since coming to new york. this place has big landmarks, but it doesen't have a single coffeehouse that i can find, or much of a community mindset.

commercial drive on the other hand...

5) sat in my room at the seafarers.

feeling: sad-esque. i'm not really "taking this all in" as much as i am just "letting it happen", as dave described it.

realizing: i am a very self-reflective person, which is both good and horrible. for all the trying to figure out who i am, i'm still having trouble with loving myself (unselfishly). or something.

6) the sessions today were about factory farms, and local food. i'm considering becoming a vegan again.

7) listened to some damien rice. no wonder i feel so down.

i'm coming home tomorrow, to plan events and write that ten page paper. i wish i could describe this trip a little better, or at least pull some kind of profound statement out of it, but its just not happening.

i promise you, yet again, some prose. as soon as i find a decent coffehouse / as soon as i get back to the pacific northwest. and i promise to listen a little more, instead of talking all the time.

we'll see, soon.